I've said it before and here I am saying it again - sometimes all you are is a stray thought. Oh I know you think you are a whole set of ideals and ideas, experiences and influences, deeds and desires. And often times maybe you are all those things, if you can find the time to balance them all in your head. When you pause for personal station identification - I guess you could list pages and pages of "things" that gestaltalize into the sum of the whole that you call You.
But sometimes, maybe even most times - you are simply one thing turning over in your advanced monkey cranium. You are hunger. Or you are boredom. You are in love. Or you are horny. You are that one time you were a dick at that party. Or you are afraid of something half remembered in the darkness coming out of a dream. Or you are this blog entry you have to get done before you forget why it is you bother blogging at all.
Sometimes all you are is loneliness. Sometimes all you are is the adrenaline immediately before a shot of tequila. Sometimes you're the burn that comes immediately after. Then you're hung on a dumb piece of trivia. You're caught in a glance with a beautiful stranger. You're the weather later this afternoon. You're the need to urinate. You're this song you love. You're a television show you don't even enjoy. You're the phone bill that needs to be paid.
You are all of these individual moments. Stand alone instances. Slices of identity. It’s always been easier for me to be these things than to be a continuing narrative. I'm bad at history and even worse at destiny - but I've always been pretty good at now.
Give me that. Give me now, again.
Give me now, forever.
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